Awkward's Humour and Sillies

Computer Jargon 2

ANALOG:Hors d'oeuvre, usually made from cheese and covered with crushed nuts.
BACKUP:Opposite of go forward
BATCH PROCESSING:Making a lot of cookies at once
BINARY:Possessing the ability to have friends of both sexes
BIT:12-1/2 cents
BRANCH:If watered, it will grow into a computer club (see computer club)
BUFFER:Programmer who works in the nude
BUG:1. Programmer's term for a feature.
BUG:2. An elusive creature living in a program which makes it incorrect.
Note: The activity of "debugging" or removing bugs from a program ends when a programmer gets tired of doing it, not when all the bugs are removed
CHARACTER DENSITY:The number of very weird people in the office, divided by the floor space
COMPUTER:A device designed to speed and automate errors
COMPUTER CLUB:Used to strike computer forcefully upon receiving error messages
CODING:An addictive drug
COMPILE:A heap of decomposing vegetable matter
COMPILER:Noah Webster (1758-1843)
CONSOLE:What one does to a "down" computer
CURSOR:An expert in 4-letter words
DUMP:A system programmer's work area
FEATURE:Hardware limitation as described by a marketing representative
HARDWARE:The parts of a computer which can be kicked
KEYBOARD:An instrument used for entering errors into a system
LANGUAGE:A system of organizing and defining error messages
LOOP:See loop
A program which will not run on any machine
MICROCOMPUTER:One millionth of a computer
NULL STRING:The result of a 4-hour database search
ONLINE:The idea that a human should always be accessible
PASSWORD:The nonsense word taped to your terminal

Back to Index Of Computer Jokes
Back to Main Humour Index

Contact me at

Last updated 21/06/2000 at 23:09